“Worthwhile thoughts have not gotten any easier to come by, but it is certainly simpler to record them and to communicate them to others. When almost anyone can print out words and thoughts there is, I suspect, a decline in reverence for the printed word. This sets the stage for critical reading and makes it a more natural and acceptable thing to do.” – Julian Meltzoff
So, do you think about what you read or just accept it all at face value?
“So, what kind of homework do you have tonight?” I asked Sophie as we were driving home from school.
“I just have to take a math test. But I can do it on my iTouch,” she coolly replied as though this were a normal occurence.
“What?” I thought I had misheard her.
“I just need to take an online test. I don’t need a computer, just my iTouch.”
And there, in that moment, I was amazed at how different our kids’ lives are today, compared to when we were their ages. I still don’t even own a iTouch….
Yesterday was the deadline for the costco.com coupons. I was going to buy an anti-virus software for my kids’ computers that was advertised at $19.99, $35 off! The ad had been sitting on my computer for nearly two weeks. Why I wait until the last minute, I don’t know. It’s the 11th hour syndrome. If the 11th hour did not exist, nothing woauld get done. So, in the 11th hour, just before going to bed, I realize I need to buy this thing or I will miss out. So I log on, put the item in my cart (it still says, “19.99 after $35 off”) and buy it. Except my receipt says, “54.99.” Why? Because it is already the next day on the east coast. So now I have to send an email to customer service and make a mental note to call Costco.com in the morning. Which I haven’t done yet, but I will. I haven’t done it because the following quote from Seth Godin’s blog was in my inbox. Seriously. Like he was talking just to me.
“Deadlines make people do dumb things. … Never mind that they had two weeks… the last fifteen minutes are all they are concerned with. If it’s important enough to spend an hour complaining about, it’s certainly important enough to spend four minutes to just do it in the first place.”
Thanks, Seth. I will remember your words, “If it’s important enough to spend an hour complaining about, it’s certainly important enough to spend four minutes to just do it in the first place,” next time I set something aside because there is “plenty of time” before the deadline. To read Seth’s blog, visit sethgodin.com.
They are swarming around my chimney…. So,
I called the LADWP. They referred me to Los Angeles Vector control (a vector is a stinging insect, who knew?). They referred me to the Los Angeles Agricultural Department who does not deal with bees. They referred me to pest control companies and beekeeper companies. Beekeeper companies try to remove the bees by “taking them away” without exterminating them. The exterminators, well, exterminate. And it all costs money, honey. And if they have started making honey, then it costs lots of money to eradicate the problem because the honey, the honeycomb and any bee carcasses must be removed. After all this, my head is literally buzzing. Or is that just the swarm I am hearing outside my window? Bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.
Struggling with how to deal with my teen and pre-teen boys asserting themselves and finding themselves in the veritable maze that we now seem to navigate daily (sometime days better than others), I have discovered that going back to basics is key.
Basic #1. Your kids do not need a friend, or a buddy or a pal. They need a parent. And parents can seem unreasonable and embarrassing and like they don’t know what they are talking about. But at the end of the day, “Because I am your mom” is enough. No other explanation necessary.
Basic #2. Everything is a privilege. Soccer is not a right. Baseball is not a right. Being driven anywhere is not a right. Computers, iPods, Xboxes, cell phones, iPads, playing with friends, riding in the front seat, being left home alone, being allowed to “go on ahead” on your own, being allowed to go to a party, ceremony, friends house, guitar lessons, it is all a privilege. And it can all be taken away.
Basic #3. If you say it – swear it – threaten it – or even whisper it loud enough for them to hear, you MUST follow through and/or stand your ground. Regardless.
Basic #4. While critical thinking is a valuable skill, and the art of the negotiation is an admirable quality even in your children, bartering is for the birds. Bartering is exchanging one thing for another – for example, “If you clean the bathroom, you can play Xbox online with your friends.” This sets a dangerous precedent for years of misery. Do not barter with your kids. They need to clean the bathroom because they use it.
Basic #5. Reward the good. Comment on the good. Focus on the positive. Everyone just wants to feel like they are loved and that they make a positive contribution. So let them.
