Often times there is so much energy going out, taking care of others – making sure others are tended to, cared for, fed, validated, lifted up, cleaned up, and good to go – that all that is left for me is time to quickly swoop in, grab a crumb and fly away before someone else grabs the table. 

During a reaching-out-and-listen-to-me-as-I-have-my-own-pity-party conversation, my dear friend, Kim, nailed it on the head. “You are depleted. Totally empty,” she wisely stated with a kind and tender tone so as to know that she was there to give, not to take anything more away. And as I sat in silence, feeling a tear roll down my cheek, I realized she had heard me, felt where I was. I was so grateful I could not speak. “Find someone or something, anything, that fills you up. That does not take anything from you. Put yourself first today, tomorrow and the next day, and replenish.” And I did.  The first thing I did was cancel commitments, said no to time constraints, and kissed my boys as they left for grandma’s house with Keith. I met and caught up with another dear friend that I had not seen in far too long.  I called another that seemed to have slipped through the cracks of the day to day routine. Kim kept texting me, checking in, “cheering” me on throughout the day.

The next morning, I ran the local hiking trails with my trail running buddy – and felt stronger after! I took a nap. I went to a party and met new people. I slept late the next morning. I watched three movies, weeping and laughing and crying through the tears during each one. I took another nap. I filled the house with fresh food and flowers. I played my music. It was all truly cathartic. By the time the weekend was done and my kids were home from their grandmother’s house, I was full again and ready to give. To them, to friends, to family, to you. Thank you, Kim, for giving back to me.